Losing My Virginity.......

oh yes.........ohhhh yessss.... ~

NO its definitely not the first sensation of any middling mind that i would be talking abt.....neither has it got any thing to do with the best seller and autobiography of Mr Richard Branson..
A few days before the start of the 4th sem, unto now and going-on, i have been experiencing the inimical colors of this phony pretty looking lady witch, we better know as life. And it seems like this wayward lady has already started ****ing (contents suppressed) me with each of its adverse happenings feels like a new K S position....

confession of an innocent mind~ kurkure effect....
It started, 1st when i got caught in my neighbour's room where a hardcore booze party was going on. Well i was there to have some light snacks, they wre having with fosters. Dont knw what the fuck was the attendant doing at 1 am in the morning came up from nowhere and banged the door. I went to open the door (as my only my mouth was not stinking with the scent of beers ) and i told him that a b'day party is going on and that we are almost over. By that time inside the room each n every attempt of making it look clean and normal was going on. But as Murphy says..when a bad has to happen, it will happen anyway. 1 disposable glass with diminutive amount of beer was present got his eyes hold . Reputation of all of us were commendable till date so no further action or DISCO ( disciplinary committee) was held. Still I had to write the FIRST ever apology letter of my life ( for eating namkeens and kurkure in a room, where, why should i bother if others wre drinking or doping)

suspension~ 1 night @ library.....
Sem started, whoops im abt to become a half engineer. Results maintained their graph ( of negative slope). Then came this night just like any other night. After hving our dinner, me and kamal thought of a walk outside at 10 pm, 2 hrs after the dead line to enter the hostel. And to my dreadful fate, while returning back to hostel, the warden, dean sir and all the possible people whose presence could hv made the situation from worse to worst were present thr (hail murphy !!). A suspension from the hostel for 4 days was avowed, aghast! Well thats the FIRST ever suspension of my life and for kamal he was was counting on his fingers..........

p.s. we spend the 1st night of suspension in the library, which itself was so eventful that it demands a separate sacred space in this blog.... this blockbuster wud be posted soon....
cont...

valentine gift~ errotic.....Oops erratic....
16th edition
13th feb : 8:05 pm
Next day is V-day, for me like a special day this time, not that i was xpecting any "i like you" or "i love you" kind of mind-soothing, heart-tempting phrases, but still i was happy to hv a very special girl in my life, and it was enf to had her evn as frnd that day (also she was single to the best of my knowledge but that was hardly any bonus for me.... :P ) ; I called her and we chatted for some 10-12 mins (little shorter than our usual half an hr chit chats.......) and at the end of conversation she told me about her new found love....

That night was a little disheartening and i deleted almost all the materialistic memories of her ( she would feel awfully blissful and relieved if she'll ever get to know this............. ). I dnt knw y i was feeling this way but it was just a transient gale of emotions and very soon made i up my mind wid a smiling face to forget evrythng and treasure my best ever "she - frnd", cos at no cost, could i afford to loose someone, i hv spend one of the best times of my life with (dsnt matters if most of it was on phone only) , to let go out of my life for any stupid reason (not now atleast, when i gotta need her badly.......) ; .... :)
But the unexpected was yet to happen..
Murphy says....
leave to themselves things tends to go from bad to worse.....

she was changing (or im nt sure if it was nly me who was feelin dat way.....) and so was her attitude ; She didnt needed a frnd anymore to divulge her assorted feelings or to share the long craps with (thanks to the "johnny-come-lately"......); miscalls became a formality and msgs (what the heck are they ??) and that call turned out to be our last ever exchange of words.... Not only i lost an amazing friend but the most serious crush (could have used a better word here, but that would sound too slushy....) of my life; Im glad & content that im out of her life at the time when she is elated like never before....a brand new boyfrnd and admission to an elite colg; Well who cares, there is always-- Another-- Better-- ...............brooding over my mind, i ended up all. Atleast a 1000 questions still drubbing my mind, i was supposed to remain unanswered;
(now before i get even more nostalgic and engender a blueprint for another weepy ekta kapoor's soap let us discuss it no further..... never further.......)

p.s. There's never Another--Better........ its olwayss the "second-best" that follows.... and i got many other btr things to do..

beyond life ~ loss, unfathomable....
1st march : 8:00 pm
My mid sem is to start from the day after tomorrow and my cell starts singing.. Had she come to knw abt my exams from my orkut profile and has called to wish me up or may be its long time we didnt talk to each other and dat the wait is over...or ya possibly............... running on my mind i took the cell and a no point guess........ that it wasnt her........
Preeti, my cousin staying in chennai had called me. I didnt took mch long to find out that she was sounding different, very different from her usual 10 sec long Hiieeeeeeeeeee......
putting end to my utter disgust she told me that Keshav is no more....and bursted into tears. gobsmacked, I hanged up the phone, went outside the hostel and only 1 thing beating my mind "what the fuck! i hv send him a get well soon sms last night only" i spent the rest of the night thinking about him. I have never been to any party or any social gathering without him, more than just being my 1st cousin, he was my bestest bddy in cal. What am i goin to do now in cal what about the durga puja night outs...holyyyy fuck! how could this even happen to him, he is just 18, never fagged,neva doped, never drunk nt evn more than a novice like me..... 2008 is turning out to be a bad omen for everyone (with a few exceptions, founding new loves and getting admissions to their dream place) but dnt know why i still wanted to talk to her, may be cos she always managed to bring a smile on my face, either telling me the stupidiest crush stories of her life or by the poorest of jokes dnt knw how she cracks them so well, her infantile accent and smtimes just listening to her melodious angle like voice was more then enf (and for the next 1 month i wanted to....and i waited too) but no big surprise that she was soo happy and busy with her ongoing life that she hardly ever felt the absence of any friend (frnd she once said "i like you"................. duh);
Life's sch a bitch......I would write a whole new article on this keshav-mishap in my later posts....
cont....

Xshtraa toppings ........

I lost in a literary competition, sensex sinking down,nt studying well, gym is all-over, not evn making it to the podium in the quiz events (call myself a hardcore quizer), routine is comp disturbed..... are i know not the points worth mentioning here but its just like adding toppings to the sequence of unfortunate events happening with me (not that significant) but with people around me and people i love....
Its not the 2 more months this sem has to go (and probably this curse as well) thats making me overwrought. But.........i m really missing all the fun and................... friends